I can't stand to be in the same room with myself tonight.
I can't cry even when I really want to.
I'm scared. And I'm serious.
Tomorrow I'll be alright. Tomorrow I will be embarrassed to say these things. Tomorrow I will tell people I'm fine and really believe it. But tonight they are true. Tonight the demons are back and I don't know what to do.
I'm sorry I'm going through my own emotional shit at the same time everyone else is. I wish I wasn't, so I could try and help. At the very least, I wish I had a rational reason for feeling this way. But I don't. No crisis. No broken heart. No family problems.
Whoever reads this will probably look at me differently tomorrow. I'm scared of that, too. But I'm also afraid to not say these things. And I'm afraid to say more than this.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
I'm going to bed.